The Fix It Store

The Fix It Store
 
“OK Ray, camera rolling action after one,two, three.” The director finished counting points at Ray. Smoothly without hesitation, Ray turned to the artisan carpenter next to him. Pointing at an object covered by a piece of gingham cloth. He enquires. “So Bill was that one of the strangest objects you have ever worked on?” Bill nods his head. “Oh yes Ray, I have never worked on a wooden sculpture of a four foot ant before! To say it was fiddly with the antennas and spindly legs would be an understatement”
Ray nods seriously, but then out of nowhere he bursts into laughter. 
“Sorry everyone, it’s just Bill’s earnest face, it’s a sculpture of a bloody ant!”
Trevor the director sighs, “Ok let’s go from the top again. Please Ray before we call in the owners try not to laugh at them. Remember pathos. Sad faces, it is a reminder of the man’s youth, he sorely misses it etc. etc. you know the drill. Pull off the cover and watch their excited looks. Hope at least one of them cries. Probe them on how exactly they are feeling. Close up of the man holding the precious ant to his chest. Finish off with Bill saying it was an absolute privilege to be able to work on such a fine sculpture. What we don’t do is laugh and say it’s a bloody ant mate!”
Ray nodded his head, he knew Trevor was right. He had been doing this long enough to know to be a consummate professional at all times. But just sometimes the stuff that comes through the barn door. Old vacuums, ironing boards, a spade with a broken handle. All the time the same story, handed down by my grandfather/mother to my father/mother now I have it. It’s the only link to my past. Sometimes Ray just wants to bang their heads together and tell them it’s just an object. You have your memories. Just remember those days with them. You don’t need to look at a bloody vacuum or a badly made sculpture of a bleeding ant! 
Ray himself had no links to his pass. Never knew his dad, his mum sadly fell into dementia at a relatively young age so Ray became her carer at the tender age of fifteen until her death on his twentieth birthday, so really the past to him should stay firmly in the past. He always felt jealousy of these folks rocking up with their broken shit to be mended by talented carpenters, metal workers, clock menders, ceramic restorers.The list went on. All of the staff in the barn are world renowned in their particular field of expertise. All to bring back a small memory of the participants' past. He wished he had at least one memory he would like to bring back by holding a much loved object.
“Ok Trevor let’s go again.” Trevor nodded and counted him in, Ray went into smooth presenter mode. 
“So Bill was that one of the strangest objects you have ever worked on?”
“Oh yes Ray, I have never worked on a wooden sculpture of a four foot ant before! To say it was fiddly with the antennas and spindly legs would be an understatement.”
Ray nodded this time everything went as smooth as butter. “And cut, well done Ray ok grab a cuppa we will do a bit with the bear ladies, five minutes worth of them washing the bear fur and then picking the eyes.”
Ray wanders off to the back room, grabbing a cup, making a coffee, shaking his head. How much footage do they have of the ladies washing bear fur, or of Dan the clock man cleaning the cogs of an old clock in an ultrasonic washer? Hours of that shit, he argued with the producers when he first started saying why don’t they just film these filler bits once then just cut and paste them in each episode. 
“Ok Ray the couple have turned up for the reveal of the ant sculpture. Remember pathos, show you care even if it is a crappy ant ok?” Ray nodded then enquired “Do they look like they will turn on the waterworks?”
Trevor looked thoughtful, then nodded his head.
“I think the chap will, he kept saying that sculpture was the one and only single thing apart from his immediate family that means anything to him. His wife looks a bit hard-faced. I don't think she will go. Anyway, let's go and find out. You line up next to the reveal table, we will do some continuation checks. When everyone’s happy, the scene is lined up seamlessly then we will tell Ian and Jane to enter to collect the ant.”
“Ok Trev oh which stock ending shall I use after they leave? I was thinking the sideways look at Bill and use the well done you pulled out the stops on this one line.” “Sounds good Ray, ok see you on the other side”
Ray stood by the table next to Bill as the crew checked they were both standing in the same position as earlier, to make it look like it all happened at the same time. The barn doors open and in strides a large ruddy faced man and a small hard faced lady in their sixties. Ray whilst standing there recapped in his mind their backstory when they brought the ant sculpture in. It belonged to Ian the large red faced man, his dad handed it to him telling him it was sculpted by his dad on his birth. It was due to the fact Ian’s dad was christened Anthony so it was a playful thing to give him. Then the usual story of how important Ian’s grandfather was to his life blah blah blah. The ant was so important, reminding him so much about growing up in a happy family ( although not important enough to actually take care of it properly!). 
Right cameras are rolling professional face time. 
“Hello Ian, Jane, wow Ian you really can’t take your eyes off the cover can you? I can tell you really missed the ant didn’t you”
Ian nodded, after a few minutes of back and forth conversation. Eventually Ray turned to Bill with a nod of his head told him to take the cover off.
Bill removes the gingham cloth revealing a wooden ant. Ian’s face crumples, tears of joy run down his face. Everyone could see the joy and happiness on his face. Ray, the ever consummate professional, probed him with telling questions trying to elicit as much emotion out of the big man. Eventually Ian turned to his wife clutching the ant. 
“Look Jane, it looks amazing doesn’t it” Jane smiled at her husband. “Put it back on the table so I can have a proper look dear.” With some reverence Ian placed the ant back down. Jane stands over the table inspecting the ant. Looking back at her husband she smiles again. “This is so important to you isn’t it dear? The only thing you have talked about the last few weeks. You truly have missed it haven’t you?” 
Ray looked at Jane and for a second thought he saw a gleam in her eyes. A look of excitement? Something is wrong here, he thought. Jane puts her hand in her coat pocket, turns back to the table then slowly and deliberately pulls out a small lump hammer out of her pocket and before anyone can stop her. She smashes it down on the ant. Bits of the wooden ant splinters everywhere, she drops the hammer with a victorious look. Prods her finger into the chest of her large husband who was struck dumb by what just happened. 
“Now the only thing you care about is broken. You can pick up those bits and take them to that floozie you’ve been shagging, you destroyed my family. Now I destroy you, turning back to the table she sweeps the broken ant onto the floor. Ian stoops down picking up as many bits as he can before running after his wife. 
Total silence in the barn then slowly Ray gives Bill a sideways look then in his best baritone voice “well done Bill you really pulled out the stops on this one!”
 
The End