Out

He’d been living as an openly Closeted Transgender Man. He’d moved back to the town he’d been raised in. He no longer considered it his hometown. Nothing had changed in the short time he’d been gone. Shiloh had come out of the closet during an argument with his dad Owen. He’d shamed Owen for everything. That Michele would’ve been ashamed of him. He never felt comfortable telling Owen anything about Constantine either. Even though Owen had known for a while that Constantine is Gay. Owen was visibly uncomfortable in the brief time he’d talk about anything romantically when talking about Constantine. So he stopped talking about it all and focused on other things Constantine was doing in his life. He didn’t mind. 

Constantine had been one of the first people he’d told at the beginning of his transition. He’d been going to a Safe Haven for LGBTQ+ people in the area. He’d become a Speaker for the Center a few months into his transition. He’d begun living his life a little more openly. The move back home came when his dad finally divorced a woman he had no business marrying in the first place. Michele’s death from a Brain Aneurysm had broken Shiloh in a way nobody he knew understood. 

Shiloh struggled to find a job after moving back home. He had issues at the few jobs he had. He’d managed to save a little bit to have some time in South Florida. In hopes to find a job and move. There was nothing for Shiloh in his current environment. He’d partly gone back into the closet. He’d not been able to get his name or gender marker changed. He didn’t have the money for it. He knew he possibly never would either. He’d be homeless if he hadn’t been living with Owen. He made nowhere near enough for rent. Even at the low income apartments. The little money he had barely covered the bare essentials. 

The Retail job he got had become the longest job he had. The holidays obviously being the time he got the most hours. It meant more money he’d saved. He’d stock up on things for the next few months. He’d gotten Food Stamps. It helped more than he’d realized. He barely did anything else other than doodling when he wasn’t at work. He’d been the opening cashier for a while. He would straighten most of the store before the store even opened. The Home Goods section being the largest part of the store being the only section he’d never be able to get it. 

The last time Shiloh spoke to Owen was during the last argument he had with him. It was Shiloh that talked the most. More like screaming at Owen about how much he’d failed him. He’d secretly sold most of the drawings he had. Shiloh didn’t care he was going to essentially be homeless and jobless when he left for South Florida. He’d packed everything he didn’t use on a daily basis. It didn’t take long to pack the rest of his things. He put his dirty clothes into a trash bag and went to a nearby Laundromat. He reflected on everything that happened while he did nearby laundry the Laundromat before heading to a Hotel closer to the Train Station for the night. 

He’d been far happier in the short time since leaving the house. The trip into the Amtrak Station in Miami felt like a few minutes to Shiloh. He’d been deep in thought the entire time. He’d written in the journal he’d put into his backpack. He’d managed to find a job in Ft Lauderdale rather than Miami Beach. He’d found a better opportunity in Ft. Lauderdale. He’d booked a room at an Extended Stay Hotel for two months hoping to find a job. It hadn’t taken him as long as he’d thought it would. Then again he’d applied to a lot of jobs in both Miami Beach as well as Ft. Lauderdale in the first hour of the trip. To have a little more time to think about what he was going to do. He’d saved the jobs he hadn’t applied to for later. Obviously. He knew he had some time to find a job before money ran out. 

He’d moved to a Studio Loft apartment in Fort Lauderdale six months after moving to Ft. Lauderdale. He loved every minute. He’d spend the majority of his days off in Miami Beach. His Studio Loft was just a place to briefly stay when he had to work. He’d become a Minimalist during the nine years in the town he’d grown up in. He’d either donated or thrown away nearly everything. He’d packed up what he never used while he was at it. For eventualities. He’d wander around the backstreets when going to the nearby shops. He didn’t mind doing that on the way back home. A little walk after eating something. The extra large luggage back fit nearly everything he left with. His book bag held the rest of his things. He’d felt free for the first time in his life. A sense of peace washed over him as he watched the sunset his first night in Ft Lauderdale. He reflected on that night often. How much had changed. His only plan was to keep the website he’d built and continue selling his drawings when he wasn’t working.