Out of the woods

TRIGGER WARNING: MENTION OF SUICIDAL IDEATION



He’d always battled Depression. It’d gotten increasingly worse though. Thoughts arose he didn’t want. Thoughts he wasn’t so sure how to move through. He wanted to live more than he wanted to die. He just wasn’t sure how he was going to manage to do that. The toxic living environment he was living in didn’t help. His Epilepsy meant he wasn’t able to drive. His job as a Dishwasher paid enough to get by. The current state of the United States meant he couldn’t save anything even when he tried. It also meant he wasn’t ever able to save anything. 

“I don’t understand how you can live the way you are and-” Piper began
“And I’m done with your ignorant, judgmental behavior. I TOLD you he and I have plans that day. Had you ACTUALLY talked to myself or him you’d know that it was only dad that went to the convention. There was never enough money for myself, much less Riley. Things you’ve said about things I wear never helped. It showed you're really an Ally. You’re a bigot and downright ignorant” Rooney replied
“That’s so hurtful. I’m not-” Piper tried saying
“Yeah, I’m not sorry. You’re no friend of mine” Rooney said before getting up to leave

Rooney had been an openly closeted Trans man. He couldn’t fully be himself. There were several safe spaces he was comfortable in. There were roughly one hundred people that loved him for who he was. He appreciated those that love him for who he is. Those who didn’t were the typical Transphobes he knew would never change. Their actions spoke louder than anything they’d ever say. People, even after he shared his story, would never love him for who he is. Actions spoke far louder at the end of the day. 

His deep Depression worsened over the next three months. One thing after another happened to him. He wasn’t so sure he could handle much more. An opportunity in Miami Beach brightened his day. An opportunity in the Marketing Department he wasn’t going to miss out on. An opportunity he took knowing he’d be homeless for a while. He didn’t care. It was an opportunity to finally have a better life. He was moving to a place where he’d be loved for who he is. A place where he’d be able to live as himself instead of hiding who he is. 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Charlie asked
“Yes dad, I’m positive. This might be the only chance for me to have a life. I don’t have a life here. I’m not ever going to. Plain and simple” Rooney retorted 
“It’s so expensive down there though” Charlie replied
“I’m well aware, thank you. I’ve managed to save barely enough to accommodate things until my first few paychecks. This job pays well” Rooney mentioned
Yeah, but-” he began
“But nothing. I’m taking the job. It’s likely going to be my only opportunity. I’m going to take it” Rooney said 

It had been the best decision he ever made. He was far happier than he’d been. In a long time no less. His mothers death over twenty years prior left him grieving. He knew he was going to grieve the rest of his life. The severe trust issues that came from being betrayed so often, on top of losing so many people throughout the years, left him with few friends. He didn’t even keep in touch with most people. A misunderstanding with his best friend Oliver was the cause of the majority of his trust issues. He’d gone through his transition entirely alone. It felt that way to him. Those that loved him for who he is after he came out helped him. They let their actions speak for them. He appreciated their help. 

I’m happy you’ve stayed. Its meant the world to me. Life has been hard. You’ve made it this far” Avery said
Thanks, I’m not sure how I managed to survive this long though. I’ve got another opportunity in Colorado. I’m taking it” Rooney replied
That’s awesome. I’m so proud of you” Avery exclaimed
Thanks. It’s a breath of fresh air I’m in need of” Avery smiled

Colorado was the second best decision he made. Avery had been the first person he met after moving to Miami Beach. He was the first Trans person he spoke to that helped him move through everything he was feeling. Avery was the only person Rooney let in. They’d gotten close. Rooney was sad to leave. him behind. Colorado was a new start for him. New beginnings far away from the place that never loved him. A place he could roam around. A place that gave him hope for a better life than in South Florida was able to give him.